We're back!

Well, those thin-skinned knuckledraggers over at Conservapedia have tried their best to shut down any criticism of them and their right-wing hate-blog, by closing down the old "We Couldn't Make This Up."

 

I'm sure they're incapable of grasping the irony of doing this, even as their own Brother Leader, Andrew Schlafly, bemoans "liberal censorship" thwarting his attempts to inflict his made-up list of conservative words. Then again, I doubt they grasp many other 3-syllable words either.

Well, just to say that firstly, I must be doing something right if that gang of right-wing thugs feel so threatened by my writings. Secondly, we're back! A bit older and wiser, thus I'll have to go to the inconvenience of running several blogs simultaneously, so at least they'll still appear in the Google searches.

Still, the fact that they're running scared tells me I'm doing something right. Let the show go on!

Self Strangulation

If you've tried to visit Conservapedia recently, especially from a location outside the US of A, chances are you've been met by the notice above.  Don't worry, there's nothing wrong with your browser, or your connection - it simply means that Conservapedia's administrators have blocked you from viewing their site at server levels. That's right - not content with banning people from editing their little right-wing hate-blog, they're  now preventing people - especially all those nasty, liberal non-Americans - from even looking at the crap they publish.

Ok, so the actual reason is a bit more complex than that. It would appear as if our friends over at Conservapedia have been one of a number of site that have been under a Denial of Service attack (DoS). What this essentially means is that the host server is flooded with automated requests, which either slow it right down, or cause the server - and linked web pages - to crash.

There appear to be two groups behind the latest swathe of attacks - the first being hacker group Anonymous, who have launched a war on copyright and the other seeming to be extortionist attacks, originating from China. As with most things, those in the know tackle the problem and get on with their lives.

But not Conservapedia.

Oh no, first of all they have to massage their massive persecution complex, because - of course - this DoS attack is all about them. And it's not a bunch of Oriental crooks trying to squeeze them for a dollar, nor is it Anon using CP to make a point. Oh no, as "senior" administrator Brian Macdonald, aka Karajou, puts it:

What this means to the average layman reading this is a DDoS attack is conducted by the liberal left when they are faced with an idea they don't like; There are people who do not like conservatism; they do not like the morals and responsibility and accountability which is attached to conservatism. They cannot stand God, they cannot stand the Bible, and many of them are quick to dismiss "Jeebus" - as they call Jesus - as nothing more than a farce. And most of all they cannot stand anyone who would adhere to any of it. What they did to Conservapedia during the past 24 hours is very typical of their "philosophy", which is to shut down any kind of speech they don't like.

See what I mean about persecution complex? The entire machinery of the "liberal left" has been fired up to take down a two-bit backwater of a hate-blog, because you know, whenever somebody says "God", we just have the urge to do so. How dare people interfere in our site. No doubt, there has been plenty of communication with the FBI over this "vandalism" to CP. Karajou, however, has to go one step further. The DoS attack isn't because CP is a right-wing, fundie, loonie, Birther, hate-blog that liberals hate. Oh no, it's because Karajou drew a pathetic, unfunny cartoon, mocking a professor that most people have never heard of. Now how's that for a persecution complex??

However, Brian's insecurities - as many as there are - aren't the focus of this posting. It's more about Conservapedia's reaction to the DoS attack. You see, it's safe to say that the actual combined PC knowledge of CP's administrators could be written on a pinhead, with enough room left over for a good old Angel square-dance. At least they have enough gumption not to give Ed Poor bureaucrat rights and server access, no matter how many times "User 188" hints at his non-existent expertise.

Now I'm no IT boffin myself, but I'm pretty sure there must be easier ways to fend off a DoS attack than blocking half the world at server level. Otherwise, every time one happened, half the internet would suddenly be off-line. However, if there's one thing CP's administrators know how to do well - and are indeed praised for by Andrew Schlafly - it's blocking. So what better way to fend off an attack by "liberals" than by blocking them? Schlafly has even gone as far as granting server-level access to the remaining admins in his inner circle (well Karajou and Jpatt anyway. I wouldn't trust Ed Poor, Conservative or Rob Smith with an ice-cream cone, let alone a server) in order for them to make 403 range blocks.

As with all things Conservapedia, these are done to extremes, with not only large parts of the world in general and the USA in particular blocked from even reading the crap on Conservapedia, you can also bet that these aren't blocks that will expire with in a day or two, one the attack has stopped. Oh no, especially if Karajou and Jpatt are involved. These two champions rarely block for anything less than 5 years and mostly for infinity.

Which means that the site that constantly cries about conservative thought being censored have effectively cut themselves off from most of the internet, with more likely to follow. So it's somehow liberals' fault that the people running Conservapedia, instead of having the brains to how how to run a site, can only draw the wagons into an ever-tighter laager. Got to love that persecution complex.

Addendum:

Just to prove that Andy Schlafly is a lying sack of shit, in the wake of the massive DoS attack and Conservapedia shutting itself off from the outside world, just how does Andrew Schlafly deal with the matter? Well, delusionally, it would appear, as he proclaims:

Conservapedia has broken its March record for the number of unique visitors

I know today's April Fools, and I really wish I was joking. But sadly, I'm not.  You may now commence beating your head on the desk.

 

Oh dear

Hmmm... it seems as if those liberal, freedom-of-speech-hating scum-buckets have hit RationalWiki too with a DDoS attack.

Of course, Brian Macdonald and the other fuckwits at Conservapedia will rationalise (Ha!) this by claiming that we DDoS'd ourselves, thus hoping to absolve ourselves from blame for Conservapedia's DDoS attack.

The really sad part is that I wish I was joking when wrote the above sentence.

Dear Karajou

Now I know you have delusions of grandeur, coupled with a persecution complex that would make Roman-era Christians consider you intense, but please don't ever think that people are outraged over your cartoon.

I know there are many, many things you don't understand, foremost amongst these would appear to be "How to give your latest blog post a title", but I thought you would at least understand the difference between "scorn & ridicule" and "offence & outrage." As much as you'd like to believe it was your inane scribble that led to the unfortunate DDoS attack on Conservapedia (Wow, get your head around this one - even some liberals don't agree with vandal tactics) it wasn't. It was more a case of a bunch of bored 4Chan'ers, who decided to bomb the CP server, especially seeing as how it's run by such an internet guru as Andy. Maybe you should just give Ed bureaucrat rights and leave it at that.

No, Karajou, don't presume for one minute that your cartooning skills (which, let's face it, are on par with Ken Demyer's parody skills) roused sufficient wrath amongst the baby-eating atheists that they would take down CP. The only thing your cartoon offends is the intelligence of those who see it. And the only outrage it provokes, is at the first class hypocrisy of the moron who penned it. (see post below)

Andrew Schlafly - Misogynist

I know, everybody's reading the header and going, "Yeah? So? We know that - don't you remember his 'girls are inferior to boys' exams?" Of course I do, but it's not everyday that Andy "Brother Leader" Schlafly really shows us just what a misogynistic piece of crap he actually his.  In his world, women should be at home, in the kitchen, preferably pregnant and home-schooling the kids.

You know, like his mummy Phyllis did, when she wasn't out doing book signings... or speaking against women's rights... or advocating marital rape... or running her "university"... or...

The fun thing with Andy is that he has so many crazy toes that you're never quite sure just where and when they're going to bring forth another pustule of hate from his bitter, twisted little mind. In this case, it's while discussing the "Greatest Conservative Movies" - remember, in Andyland, everything can be classified into either conservative or liberal. Andy takes exception to the Disney movie "The Princess and the Frog," not because it's an awful film - and thankfully the end of Disney's princesses - but because it's full of rampant feminism. At least he didn't mention the affirmative action princess. Yet.

As with all things Andy, I feel it's best to let his words speak for him, because following on from the rank stupidity (and hate) of the pathetic comments below, I actually have nothing more to say except that the man is a festering bubo, harbouring the kind of insecurities that only come from a man who pretends to be macho, but behind the scenes, his wife handcuffs him to the bed and whips him bloody. Because that's how he gets off and it makes him feel so dirty.

Spotsbunch, I think you have a valid point about the Lion King, but from what I've heard about the "Princess and the Frog," it's feminist claptrap with the woman wearing the pants and doing everything except having children and homeschooling her kids. It's more Disney tripe about a successful businesswoman towing along an inept man, which is hardly typical in the real world. (link)

and

Feminism is unmistakable: it has women acting like men and vice-versa, contrary to reality. Disney cartoons have been ''heavily'' feminist for at least 15 years. ''Beauty and the Beast'', made 20 years ago, was not feminist in any way. But having a "Princess" act like businessman and aspire to run a restaurant is feminist. What's next - Cinderella aspires to be a CEO of a Fortune 500 company??? (link)

Hypocrite!

Yes, I'm probably going to attract all kinds of abuse for doing this, but frankly I don't mind. Exposing the hypocrisy of the malignant creatures that run Conservapedia is more important, so the gloves are coming off for this round.

Well, it had to happen sometime.As I've mentioned before, Conservapedia's resident idiot, Conservative (aka Ken Demyer) has been achieving sexual gratification recently, by claiming that atheists are obese - despite evidence to the contrary. The thing is, is he has hasn't stopped at that inane, childish name-calling. He's gone on to attack PZ Myers in particular, even insinuating that PZ has evolved into a pig. Yes, as with many things, Ken as a limited grasp of what "satire" means.

Now, Andrew Schlafly, and his spineless sysop toadies, have, of course, defended Ken's pathetic name-calling, thus revealing themselves, once again, as pathetic, bitter, small-minded, malign creatures, with not a single Christian principle between them. But I'm going to focus on one in particular - the bitter old swabbie Brian Macdonald.

Now he touts himself as Conservapedia's resident artist and comedian (I use both words in their broadest possible context, of course), frequently decorating CP's main page with editorial cartoons - the quality of which has been rapidly declining over time. You can have a look at his collected works here, or if you'd prefer, the attempts by Rationalwiki editors to make his cartoons funny here. His latest effort sides with both Ken's pathetic "atheists are obese" claim, as well as a direct attack on PZ Myers. Here it is:

Yes, I know, cartoons are supposed to be funny. We're hoping Karajou will get there eventually. Still, Karajou thinks it's funny to poke fun and laugh at fat people? Ok, laugh this off, funny man...

One of the leaked posts that was held back from general publication, was one from Brian entitled "Yes, I'm showing off my kid!" In it, he bragged about his son playing the sax in his school's jazz band. Now, a) jazz sounds dangerously liberal to me and b) I'm guessing that 8th grade would make the kid about 13 or 14.

So imagine my surprise when I follow the link, to find that Brian's teenage son appears to have a serious weight problem, especially for one so young. We're not talking a few extra pounds either. No, Brian Macdonald's (Conservapedia editor Karajou - he of the mocking cartoon) is OBESE - just look at the tree-trunk legs on the poor kid. The ironic thing is, it's not just me saying so. Andy Schlafly, in reply to Brian's e-mail said, "Looks to me like the football team is going to want him also!"

Of course, by Conservapedia standards, this must make him a stinking atheist. He's even wearing black! A sure sign of a baby-eating Bible hater. No wonder Brian's so full of impotent rage, when he has two of the things he claims to hate most living under his own roof. Then again, maybe that's why the kid eats. He's too young to drink yet.

Bizarre Stuff

Over on FaceBook, there's a page dedicated to Conservapedia, although ironically, it's meant as a parody page. Clearly the site that Andrew Schlafly thinks is merely used for gossip and breaking up marriages, isn't worthy of having a site advertising themselves in a positive light. Then again, why would they need to - there are plenty of people viewing Conservapedia. Why, there's enough that Schlafly thinks CP is solely responsible for the U.S.'s lurch to the right.  (You see, this is the kind of thing that happens when you surround a megalomaniac with simpering, spineless toadies.)

Now there's a very good reason that I mentioned that the FB Conservapedia page was intended as parody, because there have been some strange happenings going on over there. So strange, in fact, that if I wasn't that familiar with the general what-the-fuckery associated with Conservapedia, I'd write it off as somebody taking the piss and leave it at that. It might still be a classic Poe, or it might even be the true identity of CP's International Mug of Mystery, Ken Demyer.